Senate votes to kill some of us, as a treat

Lisa Murkowski, you'll never get a fruit basket from me

Jul 02, 2025

If you’re feeling iffy about celebrating America’s 249th birthday this week, same, and fear not. You can instead celebrate my 32nd on Thursday, July 3. Truly, nothing would make me happier than if—for even the briefest of moments—you find yourself at a BBQ, hot dog or hamburger in hand (but actually, hot dog, be serious) and think, “yeah, America sucks! Happy birthday, Alex!” And you know what? I think I’ll be able to feel it.

A reminder that all paid subscribers will be entered to win this gorgeous bundle of LA items, perfect for the end of days we seem to be rapidly approaching!!! Winner will be announced on Substack and celebrated with nationwide fireworks on Friday.

upgrade for $30 a year!

In politics: I turned on the live stream of the debate over the big ugly ass bill in the Senate last night, eventually passing out to the sound of ayes and nays as and waking up to the jump scare of JD Vance’s fugly face smirking from the dais and preparing to cast his tie-breaking vote, because, yep, it was 50-50. Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski voted yes in order to, in her words, “take care of Alaska’s interests”—even though she admitted that “in many parts of the country, there are Americans that are not going to be advantaged by this bill.” She called it “agonizing.”

First of all, and truly, no offense meant to Alaskans, I love your salmon and hope to visit someday—but I did a quick lil calculation and discovered that her constituents represent 20%…of 1% of Americans. Yes, out of 340 million Americans, only 740k of them are Alaskans (another stark reminder of how dumb it is that each state has equal Senate representation, but I digress.) And even if, hypothetically, this bill was somehow beneficial to the people she represents—though I don’t think it is, it’s just slightly less shitty because she got carve-outs for her state—how well can a fractured nation function if a senator of 23 years (term limits!!!! but I digress.) can throw the other 49 states off a cliff so that she gets re-elected?

As you may remember, the House bill was bad, but insiders expected moderation to come out of the Senate. But fun twist! This one is way worse. It’s like if you hired someone to clean a wine stain out of a rug and when it came back the wine was still there, plus a new dog shit stain—and babe, you don’t even have a dog!

The three Republican senators who bravelyish voted against it were Rand Paul, Thom Tillis, and Susan Collins. And before we give Tillis too much credit 1) he is so afraid of Trump that in order to do the right thing he decided not to run again in 2026 and 2) he’s the same guy who once said Starbucks employees should not be required to wash their hands at work, as long as a sign in the bathroom lets you know it’s optional. So standby for his next venture, Piss Coffee™: There’s probably piss in your coffee, but it’s fine because we’re telling you about it!

The consequences of this bill—a list I politely request you share with your more Fox News-inclined relatives—will be catastrophic:

Roughly 16 million people total will be kicked off their Medicaid/ACA health insurance plan, resulting in 50k+ additional deaths every year. And btw, even if you’re able to stay insured through the ACA, your premiums are going to go up by thousands of dollars.
Rural hospitals will be forced to shut down.
An extra $30 billion for ICE to terrorize our communities and $45 billion for detention facilities, like the literal concentration camp that just opened in Florida.
The largest SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) cuts in history; 40 million people across the US (12% of the entire population) rely on SNAP to eat, many of whom are in districts Trump won.
Higher energy bills, primarily in red states.
$4 trillion added to our national debt, something the “fiscal conservatives” are suddenly totally cool with?
And all of this, as a reminder, is being done so that billionaires can get a tax break to fund their insecurities, penis rockets, and $50 million weddings.

Hot tip: Don’t lose hope. Keep putting pressure on your elected officials. The House now has to pass this exact bill, and if they make any changes, it goes right back to the Senate again, where Lisa Murkowski can bravely agonize over killing Americans (but not Alaskans.)

202-224-2131 is the Capitol switchboard number. Let’s shame them into doing their jobs.

Quick tips: Zohran Mamdani officially defeated Andrew Cuomo in the New York City Democratic primary, and then like racist clockwork Donald Trump threatened to arrest and deport him. He also said he is going to look into deporting Elon Musk, which is a real catch-22 for everyone who hates fascists but also hates fascism.

In Los Angeles: In case you needed an extra reason to eat a perfect chicken pita, one of my favorite neighborhood spots, Kismet Rotisserie, is doing a special sandwich series to support CHIRLA (Coalition for Humane Immigrant Rights), the largest immigrant rights organization in California.

kismetrotisserie

A post shared by @kismetrotisserie

In sports: Cleveland, Detroit, and Philly will all be getting their own WNBA teams as the league expands over the next five years. And the 2025 UEFA Women's Euro soccer tournament begins tomorrow, July 2. (Hot tip: If you know me, you know I love the TOGETHXR brand and everything they’re doing for women’s sports visibility. Get a limited edition tee to rep your Euro team of choice.)

Cutie pies of the week: Multitalented Jonathan Bailey, who takes well-earned pride in playing clarinet on the Jurassic World Rebirth score. NYC Comptroller and former mayoral candidate Brad Lander, who had the time of his life at NYC Pride. And recent French Open champ Carlos Alcaraz, who noticed a fan pass out in the stands at Wimbledon and passed them one of his own cold water bottles.

Hot tip: Alana Haim just wants you to acknowledge the fart.

rollingstone