Sex pests, sacrilege, and protest by dildo
Or, another week in America.
It’s Tax Day, babes. So treat yourself to a “the government cashed my check but won’t consult my opinion on how to spend it” pastry today—you deserve it.
Hot Tip recently hit 5k subscribers, a huge milestone I’m celebrating by offering 50% off annual paid subs this week only (that’s $15 for an entire year!!!!), giving you access to Sunday Recos, Monthly Mags, as well as the entire archive, plus ~early access~ to a soon-to-launch podcast, and even more fun things I can tell you about soon. I am so grateful you’re here, and love shitting on Pete Hegseth with you. A dream come true to make (part of) a living this way. xo, al
In politics:
By now, you’re well aware that Eric Swalwell has both resigned from Congress and dropped out of the California gubernatorial race, prompting Republican Tony Gonzales to follow suit, blaming a proverbial change in the seasons—rather than his own sexual misconduct—for his decision to leave Congress. There’s a lot unfolding here, and I fear a lot more to come, particularly re: Swalwell’s BFF and Arizona Senator Ruben Gallego, who’s already on the defense. I commend the brave women coming forward, recommend following Betches Founder sami sage here or on threads for updates, and in the meantime offer this—deeply reasonable at this point—solution:
Meanwhile, Donald “I won’t talk about my favorite bible verse because I think it’s too personal” Trump is using the “ceasefire” with Iran to wage war on the Pope/Christians this week, reposting an AI image of himself with glowing orbs in his hands whilst wearing a white robe and red tunic, aka Jesus’ main look. After a ton of instant criticism he quickly deleted the photo, but of course owned up to nothing by claiming he thought it depicted him “as a doctor.” So he’s either a) lying, b) stupid, or c) being visited by angels of death every evening in between McDonald’s deliveries and late night tirades against the Pope. Of course, the answer could also be d) all of the above.
On Saturday, hundreds of protesters in LA, Chicago, Portland, and D.C. demonstrated their dissatisfaction with ICE via donated dongs from a recently-closed sex shop in Minneapolis in what’s been dubbed “Operation Dildo Blitz.” As one organizer said: “[We’ve] been moving dicks around all these states.” Here, I think two things can be true at once: 1) This is a terribly ineffective method of protest and 2) Watching ICE agents kick overflowing penises around is a highly effective mood-booster.
Quick tips: Mike Johnson remains a hypocritical, cowardly loser. JD Vance’s Turning Point USA event yesterday didn’t go so well. And Pam Bondi is facing threats of contempt proceedings by congressional Dems for not showing up at the Oversight Committee, but have they considered she was busy at a child’s birthday party?
In media + biz:
More than 2,000 big deal names signed a letter against the planned Paramount/WBD merger, though it’s hard to know whose side to be on—Florence Pugh, Emma Thompson, + Lin-Manuel Miranda, or the Crown Prince of Dismembering Journalists? Disney is undergoing mass layoffs as a new CEO takes over. Allbirds is getting out of shoes and into—not a joke—AI. Old Navy’s collab with Christopher John Rogers is excellent. And W Magazine will soon be publishing a biannual WYouth—pronounced “double youth”—Magazine for Gen Z readers (and if they’re cool with it, this millennial raised on Seventeen and TeenVogue.)
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As gas prices make driving and flying much more expensive—
Need reading motivation? Saaaame. So join the Hot Tip Summer Book Club here!!!!
FYC:
My favorite women's sports brand TOGETHXR is back with six new tees for the Women’s Six Nations Rugby Championship. Lena Dunham’s new memoir Famesick is out this week, a win for all of us (esp. the Shosh suns, Marnie moons, and Hannah risings among us—hello it’s me!!!) Everything I love for spring in one place, particularly as my legs reenter society. LA Openings I’m excited about: Jyan Isaac Bread in Silverlake. Lillie Frozen Yogurt in Beverly Hills. Bar Betsy in Altadena (open now!!!)
Previously on Hot Tip:
Wow, I just love your posts. So much humor, and honestly, it makes this news feel lighter. We need that because the news that we read every day is just depressing.