Exclusively good news
Because why would I deny us joy right now?
This is a long one. Click here to read the newsletter in full if it gets cut off in your inbox.
I was a +1 at an LA premiere of the goriest, freakiest, funniest movie of 2026 on Monday night, and if you can see it in person surrounded by people—whilst covering your eyes for a not insignificant portion of it if you’re a tad squeamish like myself—Over Your Dead Body is a great and very unexpected time. The world is fucked, yes, but there’s also so much joy in a theatre full of screaming, squirming, giggling people. So we simply must keep going to the cinema and making weird, silly art, okay???
Welcome back to the third installment of Exclusively Good News™️, wherein I ignore the grievous state of the world in favor of lighter, brighter things. Today, that includes Lindsey Graham getting caught bubble-wanded, unbroken ground at the White House, and the world’s cutest app that might just get us through nuclear winter.
Hot tip: Enter the lottery to win free tickets to the April 3 dress rehearsal of Schmigadoon! on Broadway.
Di conseguenze:
Europe is staying out of Trump’s not-a-war war. Spain has closed their airspace to any US aircraft involved in Iran, while France is refusing Israeli aircraft carrying munitions in their airspace. Even Italy and its far-right PM Giorgia Meloni said “no, signore” to letting US military planes carrying weapons use a base in Sicily on their way to the Middle East. Pardon me while I celebrate ~rules and general societal norms still mattering somewhere!!!~ with a churro, croissant, aaaand cannoli.
In politics:
A man who regularly shits himself tried to intimidate the Supreme Court into going along with his plan to do away with (enshrined in the Constitution) birthright citizenship by showing up in person for oral arguments today, the first sitting president to do so. Yes, much like the other norms Donald Trump has done away with, i.e.: a president respecting the balance of power among the co-equal branches, a president not being a pedophile, a president being able to spell “judicial,” etc. he took time out of his busy bomb dropping/golfing schedule to scoot by SCOTUS on Wednesday. But here’s the thing: despite the mafioso tactics, the Court doesn’t seem to be going for it—even Trump’s handpicked conservative justices don’t seem to be on board with wiping their asses with the Constitution. But hey, maybe he at least learned something on his field trip!!!
Separately, U.S. District Judge Richard Leon halted construction of the $400 million White House ballroom. The 35-page ruling—which, by my count, has 18 exclamation marks—said in no uncertain terms that Donnie T needs Congressional approval to keep building, and reminded him that he will be moving out in 2028.
And TMZ has begun using its stalking powers for good instead of evil, this week catching Lindsey Graham at Magic Kingdom while Pete Hegseth unleashes the “holy hell” the eligible bachelor senator suggested on Iran. Graham’s excuse for the pit stop at Mickey’s house? He says he was in South Florida for a veeeery important meeting and simply stopped by Orlando “to meet friends” after. It is worth noting, though, that no proof of friends—nor an excuse for the Little Mermaid bubble wand he acquired—were provided.
Hot tip: Follow Hot Tip on Instagram for extra goodies and laughs.
In space:
Did you know we’re going to the moon again? Today? Because we are. I mean, we’re not, and neither is Katy Perry, but four actual astronauts safely and successfully departed today for a ten-day journey around the moon—they won’t be landing on it, though. Among them: the first woman, first person of color, and first Canadian on a lunar mission, all of whom look cool as shit in their sunnies.
In fashion:
Ayo Edebiri in Chanel for Paper Magazine. If ever an argument was made to go to a magazine stand and buy a print copy of something—
FYC:
There’s an app called Finch that my friend Megan Gilbert introduced me to, which is basically Neopets x self-help. It’s deeply adorable, and possibly improving my mental health. Definitely improving my mental health: my two new skorts from Gap (one gives Hallie Parker, the other Annie James), which are about to get a lot of vacation use. Hot tip: If you’re looking for love, Chelsea Handler wants to be your matchmaker.
And for anyone else trying to fight AI with real, in-person, life-living: I recently went to a banya (aka a Russian-style sauna) with my friend Leah Feygin, who hosted an event at LA’s City Spa to promote her newsletter Fluid Form. And let me tell ya—in a world of saunas with bluetooth connectivity and red light therapy (which I also like!!!! no shade), I very much enjoyed the authenticity of a shared space where the majority of the people were communicating in a language I didn’t speak and were clearly regulars. Of note: BYO platzas (demonstration here, for the uninitiated), wool sauna hats, elder Slavic men shaving their beards at the community mirror, and even a restaurant, where we noshed on pelmeni (Russian dumplings that feel somewhere between kreplach and tortellini). My phone stayed in a lockbox at the front desk.
Running to get a copy of Paper Magazine brb
I’m so glad you’re getting the full parent trap experience with your new skorts!!!